I love New Years! It is my favorite holiday. I thrive in the festivities, I love staying up until midnight and counting down to the next year, I love that there is football the entire next day.........many of the things that bring me joy are wrapped up into this holiday. I think what I like the most is that it has, since I was a little girl, brought my attention inward and forward. I am into new beginnings and reflecting on where one is. And, wouldn't you know, I end up in a profession that is about new beginnings, reflection, change, and reflecting upon where one is and where one is moving towards.
Change is an interesting thing though. It seems to me that humans think it is easy when it is someone else that is working on change, and we bump up against how difficult it is when it is our own process. Someone announces they want to start exercising and their helpful support system tells them, "Well, just go to the gym." That word just, like it is just about getting in the car and driving to the gym. It seems like it should be, right? That change is about deciding to do something differently and then creating actions to bring about the desired result. If you look around, the evidence is staggering that this is just not that easy!
I love my job because I get to see people change all of the time! I love that sometimes I can see it coming, but that other times, I get to be fascinated by the timing and the circumstances of the shifts when they happen. Sometimes it is about deciding, but time and again the shift seems to come from deeper within and has an emotional component. The thinking part is the last to know but often gets the credit! It often seems to come from accepting (the kind that comes without judgment) where and who one is, warts and all, that allows one to finally shift out of the pattern, the behavior, the perspective, the relationship, the job, the pain.
Change cannot come about without walking through, and with, the fear. No way around that one. If you want the deep, loving relationship you have to confront the fear of loss and abandonment. If you want the new adventure, career, education, you have to confront the fear of failure or, more often, of success. By the way, if you try to "kill" your fear, it will only make it stronger. Countries have played that one out since the beginning of time.
So, as you count down to 2010, reflect on where you are and meet yourself there with compassionate acceptance. From that place, what awaits will unfold.
Blessings to all in the New Year.